topic:the age of loneliness is killing us

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Re: topic:the age of loneliness is killing us

Post by Nancyzheng on Sun Nov 02, 2014 7:50 pm

It is said that in China, people spend more time on the Internet than other countries. On average, Chinese people spend more than 8 hours on Internet or cellphones every day. Especially the younger generation have a crash on Internet.
The situation has something to do with the technology development. When we had no other sources, we tend to experience life on our own. But as technology develops, we can experience a lot on the Internet. If one look for excitement, he can just play video games and doesn't have to go outside.
Another reason for the younger generation's crash on the Internet is that they feel lonely. They were born as the only child in the family. They don't want to talk a lot to their parents because of the generation gap, so they turn to the Internet.
But it causes big problem. If one spend too much time talking to their friends through Internet, their abilities to communicate with people decrease. They won't be used to talk to others in face. So this has become a vicious circle.
If we want to solve the problem, we should all reduce the time we spend on the Internet.

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It's Our Chance to make Social Groups and Commercial Groups to Eliminate Loneliness

Post by 郭晶瑾 on Mon Nov 03, 2014 8:09 am

It's not strange that loneliness is becoming more and more popular as the massive use of the Internet and mobile phone and other telecommunication tools. These tools, while strengthen the links between people , destroy the normal social demands of people.
I suggest that we build social groups and commercial groups so as to bring face-to-face experience back to people, especially Chinese people who dont have any political or religious belief. Chinese people tend to be easy to get lonely than others, they dont attend to any social groups if they are not the member of CPC party or they believe in any religion.
For example, we can build a firm for the people who have the same vocation, and arrange activity after their work time. We may arrange them go camping together, or go short trip in weekend, or even their family or children or friends togher to join the group to paticipate in the activities.
That'll be a good oppertunity for us to make money and bring happiness to the people who feel lonely inside.
2014GA 郭晶瑾

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Re: topic:the age of loneliness is killing us

Post by Edward(Wang Yunzhi) on Mon Nov 03, 2014 3:20 pm

Cai Wei (Nathan Cai) wrote:If we stop using Facebook, Wechat, etc instead of face to face communication, will we be more happier and not lonely?
However,the fact is that it is almost impossible for us to leave such communication tools now, actually ,such tools has been a part of our life, if we stop using for some days, someone maybe thing there is somethng wrong with you. So I think the key point is not which tools we are using, but whether we can focus on just one thing when we do a certain thing.

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China traditional culture could defeat the age of loneliness

Post by Rachel Han on Mon Nov 03, 2014 4:58 pm

I agree the words " the happiness do not increase with the wealth" .  It is also the situation of China in the last 3 decades.  During chasing the wealth,  people lost belief and religion, but kept distance with others,which made the age of loneliness. Love, friends and belief are the weapon to defeat the loneliness.
Looking for the solution from China traditional culture, in which have the China approach to tell people how to get inner quiet, deal with others , and how to build yours belief.

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My personal experience

Post by Yvonne (Gao Yiwen) on Mon Nov 03, 2014 5:27 pm

I just want to share my personal experience. I am a Christian. I believe in the Lord for two years. Before I was a pessimistic person who thought myself as loser, and always thought I should have done better.
Now I become much more happy. I am grateful for what I own. And I am not alone, God loves me.
The same as what Prof.Ali said in class: if we don't change ourselves internal, we can't gain happiness although we earn reputation and a lot of money.
So I think we should change from our heart, and then we could overcome loneliness.

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Re: topic:the age of loneliness is killing us

Post by Chelsea.ZhangXin on Tue Nov 04, 2014 8:01 am

I think what this piece skims over is that sociality is now redefined in the digital age. While I don't deny that individualism and neoliberal capitalism has brought forth the idea of competition more than ever before, the digital age is reshaping a lot of what we used to hold true; we're playing the same game but with a radically different rulebook. We're (in the developed world at least) past a certain "golden age" of humanity, hence the nostalgia for that past.

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Re: topic:the age of loneliness is killing us

Post by Bonnie CHEN(Chen Bo) on Tue Nov 04, 2014 10:44 am

We said and talked a lot about happiness, how happiness is not related to wealth, how to achieve inner happiness? There're denifitely some ways and suggestions to help us to avoid loneliness and isolation.
First, be much more invovled and proactive in community life which can help you build up life purpose and meanings.
Second, maintain your current relationships. You have hundreds or even thousands of cellphone number in your contacts. Just pick up your phone and make a call to your friend whom you don't contact for a long time.
Third, finding an interest or hobby you're really interested and take your spare time to do it. Get yourself occupied.

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Re: topic:the age of loneliness is killing us

Post by Rachel Han on Wed Nov 05, 2014 9:37 am

Last friday, Coca cola marketing director shared some marketing idea with us. 1 take away is that there are some core values will not fade away when time pass by, like connection, safe, journey... so they enhance the idea that drinking coca cola when you connected with your friends, family, enjoy the moment together. but some customer they say that they enjoy drink coca alone. then the markeing team come up with the idea that this is the moment "you build connection with yourself". so, for me, it's good to be enjoy the gathering moment with friends or family, but if there's some time you have to be alone, learn to be comfortable with the loneliness. See it as the moment or period you are being with yourself.

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Re: topic:the age of loneliness is killing us

Post by Chen, Huan (Helen) on Wed Nov 05, 2014 10:43 am

I lived in 301 in the building, but I really don't know the name of residence in 302 after lived more than two years. When my Mom visited me during the summer, she asked ' who are the neighbours?' I answeared:'I don't know, never talked.' She is quite surprised, because for their generation, they open the door and interact with neighbours like family.

Her feedback actually forced me to think -- Why we think 'no talking with neighbour' is norml? More than that, why we are comfrotable with living alone and refuse to open the door? Some may argue the the safty concern, but crimial exist always. And from another perspective, better social relation actually will help you if any unexpected happened.

With internet and smartphone, we are making friends with foreigners thousands of miles away, but don't know the name lived in another side of the wall. That is not healthy, we should close all the devices, go out to enjoy the sunshine, smile and talk to passgengers, make more friends in real life rather than in cellphone.

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Re: topic:the age of loneliness is killing us

Post by Chen, Huan (Helen) on Wed Nov 05, 2014 10:50 am

Our friend group just come with a new proposal -- Hand over your cellphone during dinner and put it away. Whoever checked the cellphone will pay the bill.

Cannot remember from when, even if we make the efforts to go out and sit together for a meal, we are busy are taking pictures, post on social media, wait for the feedback online and further respond accordingly....After the meet, we may add lots of comments on social media,but no much talking happened on the table among friends. Sometimes, we even sit togehter but text each other through social media app.

After the first class of CBI, I suggested this new rule in friends group and gain support. We all realize that we are talking less but without motive to stop it. Now you will find that the world won't collapse if we didn't check cellphone duringt the meal, but much more valubal discussion and connection will happen if we gather together and enjoy food without cellphone.

This might be a minor step, but really something good to start and fight back for the 'Age of loneliness'.

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Re: topic:the age of loneliness is killing us

Post by Qu Shengyuan_Sunray on Wed Nov 05, 2014 11:09 am

This is a sad period. When I saw this topic I deeply agree with the author's point of view. One month ago I attended a memorial meeting who is one of our church brother’s mother. She sick last for 20 years, rarely accompanied by family members, and at last she jumped down from the hospital building to the end of his fifty years of life. Because she feel lonely, so few people care about her, only one person lied there quietly.
Lonely in the modern life of view may seem so cool. A lot of people in the process of growth join in the love by their parents, so that the home will be seen as a boring & fretful place. When they reach adulthood that will unable to hold oneself back to find a space that belongs to oneself. With a group of friends sometimes play together but more often return to a rental house to face life alone. And with this habit, we did not want to face the group life more and more rather like a person quiet life.
This is really a terrible social problem which is not the thing itself only but also the habit still influence to the people around us life and last spreading. If the effect was not a society to appeal to everyone I really do not know what time this situation to continue to......

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Re: topic:the age of loneliness is killing us

Post by Yuzhen Bai(ERIC) on Wed Nov 05, 2014 11:17 am

Do you think loneliness will kill us?
My answer is NO.
People have two attribute: social attribute and natural attribute.
Low level living conditions make people connected tightly with each other to strive to live; at that time, they are happy because physiologic demand are satisfied, while this demand is the basic according to Maslow's hierarchy of needs.
When human beings have solved the basic physiologic demands, the spiritual demand becomes more important. New technologies have let people get information easily from internet at home while not communicating face to face. Many people stay alone all through the day. As a result, more and more people get loneliness, sick even died from this, loneliness is now affected people’s life.
In my opinion, loneliness is under control, when human beings suffer too much from loneliness and recognize the importance of healthy body, throwing away the unhealthy living styles before, and going back to nature, they will live better life, and Loneliness will disappear.

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Re: topic:the age of loneliness is killing us

Post by Sely(Xu_Wen_Wen) on Wed Nov 05, 2014 4:15 pm

I quite agree with you. Loneliness will not kill us. We can still pursue our inner happiness when being alone, and technology help us communicate with our families, friends and even strangers without face-to-face talking. Loneliness is just a sense of feeling, and if we want to release it, we can try something interesting.

What's more, many people even enjoy loneliness. They think loneliness can help them get their inspiration. People like writers or musicians sometimes create an lonely environment around them.

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Re: topic:the age of loneliness is killing us

Post by Charles Fu (Ruiqiang Fu) on Thu Nov 06, 2014 6:10 pm

Well, whether loneliness is killing us is quite difficult to say. Some people can enjoy the loneliness. They enjoy the time period that only stay with himself/herself. But other not; Along with the technology development, they are more willing to get connected. They access social society, surf on the internet to touch all kinds of information there. So I think loneliness is a inner emotional feeling for human being. Whether it is killing people, it depends.

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Re: topic:the age of loneliness is killing us

Post by Chen Liyun(Chloe) on Thu Nov 06, 2014 7:50 pm

I think it according to the different circumstances, first of all, nowadays, it has too many connections in the society, and People are busy with social contact, deal with all kinds of interpersonal relationship, but ignoring the loneliness itself is a very kind good feeling. Sometimes,for the people, the appropriate loneliness is needed, and some people really enjoy the loneliness.

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Re: topic:the age of loneliness is killing us

Post by Rachel Han on Fri Nov 07, 2014 6:50 am

this topic reminds me a book I started 2 years ago, but not finish. (Guess I'm not slow down enough to read these kind book at that time.) Walden by Henry David Thoreau. The writer himself lived around the Walden lake alone for 2 years. He started the expriment more or less for the reason when seeing people lost in the material world. Simple living and self-sufficiency were Thoreau's other goals. I'm going to finish the book. Smile
Quote one paragrah
"Let us spend one day as deliberately as Nature, and not be thrown off the track by every nutshell and mosquito's wing that falls on the rails. Let us rise early and fast, or break fast, gently and without perturbation; let company come and let company go, let the bells ring and the children cry — determined to make a day of it."

Recommend my dear classmates to read this book as well. Smile Smile

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Re: topic:the age of loneliness is killing us

Post by Chen, Huan (Helen) on Fri Nov 07, 2014 7:01 am

Yesterday we had a department gathering for lunch, I shared this article and really receive positive feedback from the team. We all think that smart phone is connecting strangers far away but disconnect the friends and relatives nearby. 

It is lucky that we are realizing this problem right now, let's do efforts to put away smart phone, control our lives by ourselves rather than controlled by smart device and social media.

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Re: topic:the age of loneliness is killing us

Post by Vanessa(Wang Jingyi) on Fri Nov 07, 2014 4:27 pm

We have destroyed the essence of humanity and resulted more and more longliness nowdays. When we were young, our parents always taught us study hard in order to become an useful person to the society in the future. However, the children pay more attention to how much money they will earn by study now.

Maybe this is a kind of social progress and some people really enjoy their longliness. But in my opinion, that is the problem caused by the rapid development of society. We can easily connect with each other through wechat, QQ, imessage, etc. But what we need now is to really communicate with people and decrease the disease of longliness.

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Re: topic:the age of loneliness is killing us

Post by FengWenya on Fri Nov 07, 2014 5:14 pm

From Feng Wenya

Sometimes short term loneliness is not a bad thing as it may trigger people to slow down and to think what is wrong. But if the loneliness last long, it will be very harmful to health both physically and mentally.  People feel loneliness when they lose the mental connection with the surroundings, as well as the inside of themselves. Then how can we maintain the mental connections between inside and outside, here is my thought:

1.Control the time spent on Wei bo/We-Chat. Huge amount of message processing every second make us mentally exhausted. We are losing the capability of focus and think deeply.
2.Increase the mental focus on our present physical elements - people around us, tasks, and physical environment), which make us really live in the moment.  
3.Find our strength, hobbies and spend time on them.

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Re: topic:the age of loneliness is killing us

Post by Huangyanming-michelle on Fri Nov 07, 2014 5:46 pm

It's a social problem that more and more people feel lonely. This phenomenon exists among not only the olds but also the young people. Young people would rather communicate with each other by wechat or other digital methods than talk face to face. Usually you can see a group young people can have dinner together happily, but after dinner, all of them are silent with playing their own smart phone. It looks that they have many friends but actually they are so lonely in their deep of their heart. Before 10 ago, people are not lonely like now. We use less smart phone and talk more with friends and families. But now, with the development of technology, it seems that we ignore the communication of face to face. Actually, communication with each other by face to face helps reduce the lonely feeling. So why don’t we abandon smart phone temporarily, do more face to face communication.

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Re: topic:the age of loneliness is killing us

Post by JamesZhang on Fri Nov 07, 2014 6:10 pm

the world is running faster and faster, so what should we do is launch health care for the old, not only on physical side, emotion side should also be included as well.

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Re: topic:the age of loneliness is killing us

Post by JIN Yuan on Fri Nov 07, 2014 7:08 pm

[quote="Joanna(Zhang Xiaojing)"]Current phenomenon:
1. Not only Europe but also Asia people are getting more and lonelier in everyday life. With the emergence of communication media, Wechat, Youtube,Qzone, etc, we are focusing mainly on individual express, but not interaction between people.
2. Every time you take the subway, you can see everybody is looking at his/her cell phone. Even though friends join in the party or dinner, everybody is looking at their cell phone whenever there is a chance.
3. Our daily work is also isolating us from contacting with others, stay in the same friend circle, not willing to meeting strangers or listening to others.
4. The big majority of unmarried people also offer the evidence that we are prefer what we can get but not what we can give.
5. Money driven life style has robbed us of the freedom, time, relationships, we spent less time on our family as well as looking after parents and children.
We really have to consider if this is really what we want.

Good conclusions for the phenomena! As the advertisement of wechat and QQ said, their goals are aimed at making communication easier. But, the consequence is beyond what we can predict. What we want, especially entertainment, information, and etc, can easily be got through electronic devices and internet, rather than the traditional way as communicating with others face to face. People, for now, prefer to chat with sms over internet with strangers, rather than the parents, relatives, friends around you who love you most. Though communication continues, but in physical and mental situation, people are lonely who don't know how to communicate with a real person, how to express themselves and how to release their negative motions. Which makes people unhappy and repressed.
As most of us have realised this situation, there are many things we can do.
1. We should change the current way of education and teamwork. More discussions and face-to-face communications could be added to make the relationship among the students or team members more closed.
2. Staying away from cellphone may be useful. But for most people, it is hard to stay away from cellphones. Some marketing promotions and business innovations could focus on this point: through the attraction with benefits, encouraging people to get away from virtual world to come back to real world to have more communications with parents and friends.
3. Communication applications could provide more functions such as video and verbal messages to help people express what they want to say better.

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Re: topic:the age of loneliness is killing us

Post by Jason(Zeng Fanlin) on Sat Nov 08, 2014 6:37 am

Technology become more and more advanced nowadays. Internet connects people around the world. You could communicate with people in other side of earth instantly. How amazing. You could call your friends anytime anywhere. But why people still feels loneliness. Firstly, technology drive people faster. We are too fast pace to stop. Every min is fully occupied with different stuffs. We forget we really want. And then suddenly once you stopped, you feel nothing to do and extremely lonely. Secondly, the society is moving accelerate. Many people are far away from home and family. The sociological need could not been compensated even with the help of technology. But we have lots pressure to bear. Temporary compromise is only choice we got. Thirdly, although technology enable us to communicate effectively, mutual trust is still missing.

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Re: topic:the age of loneliness is killing us

Post by Li Yuanyuan李媛媛 on Sat Nov 08, 2014 6:38 am

There are so many reason caused the age of loneliness, but as a candidate of MBA, maybe we should focus on the business solution for the loneliness. Indeed, there are many products/solutions such as the traditional geracomiums, Facebook, WeChat, Zhenai.com are invited to solve the loneliness issue.
However, why the loneliness also puzzles us so much even we have used these products/solutions? I remember Albert Mehrabian’s “7-38-55” theory which should let us know the connections basing Facebook, Wechat and so on are incomplete. It’s the limit of current technology, but there may be another better solution when there is new technology ready. And it should be another business chance.
Whatever, as human being, for the social issue of loneliness, we should be more positive. We can take more time to communicate with others, pay more attention to your family members and friends… We can make a better place from ourselves.

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Re: topic:the age of loneliness is killing us

Post by Steve Li(Li Rucheng) on Sat Nov 08, 2014 11:20 am

to some degree,technecal development leads to the loneliness nowadays. In the acient age,people have not so many device of something else related to entertainments to have kill the time,which foreced them to comunicate face to face with one another.After the new technologies coming into use,people are exploited in growing ways of entertainments,while each technical breakthrough usually characterizes as new type of communication.while human bees are social people,we need greeting to each other face-to face instead of texting a message though the new technologies assisst us to communication in long distance,and people seem to enjoy this kind of communication ways under the new technologies.As we know each people have limited time,since they spend time into communicating with the assistance of new technologies.so the time people spend communicating face to face is much less than before especially under the fast pace of current sociaty.

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Re: topic:the age of loneliness is killing us

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